How to make your semen taste better

sex and relationships
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Your question ‘I’ve stepped up my exercise routine over the past few months, and started using protein powders. My girlfriend loves my improved physique – but she’s not loving going down on me any more, because she reckons the supplements have made my spunk “not so nice,” as she politely puts it. Getting head is my favourite sexual indulgence, but I don’t want her to have a bad time. What can I do?’
Will P, via Twitter  

Bad luck Will – your efforts to trim your tum seem to have landed you with some rum cum! Your lifestyle and overall health, what you eat and drink, how often you ejaculate, and taking medications or supplements can all have an effect on the taste, smell, and consistency of semen. You don’t specify exactly what your partner says has changed about the nature of your fluids since you began your new regime, but I’ve heard numerous friends observe that protein powders specifically can apparently make some men’s spunk ‘unpleasantly thick and stringy’, ‘lumpy, like tapioca pudding’ or ‘chemical-tasting’.
 
Basic hygiene can keep your penis itself fresh and tasty; changing the characteristics of the ejaculate that comes out of it is a little trickier. However, there are several things that you can try to make your paste more palatable, and also techniques and tricks you can incorporate during fellatio to make BJs more of an A+ experience for you both.
 
First, visit your GP for a quick MOT just to be absolutely sure that it’s your fitness regime that’s caused the change in your fluids, as infections and prostate issues can cause this problem as well.

Semen is 90% water. Drink plenty of H2O throughout the day to ensure there’s lots of liquid available for body to process into ejaculate. If you’ve been working out more and perspiring a lot, you might be dehydrated, which could result in less pleasant emissions.
 
Ever noticed that your sweat smells of spices or garlic after chowing down on a strongly-seasoned dish? Bear in mind that such foods can have the same infusing influence on cum. Eating kiwi and pineapple (or drinking the juice) is supposed to make ejaculate taste better, although you’d need a large amount to have a noticeable impact, and if you’re on a strict diet you may not want to scoff stacks of sugary fruits in any case.
 
So, instead… Rather than climaxing in her mouth during a BJ, release yourself over her breasts, or even her face (talk this through with your missus first, as some women find this demeaning or grim rather than sexy, and do avoid her eyes because semen stings!). She won’t have to worry about retching over unfortunate flavours or textures, and you’ll benefit from great visuals.
 
If cumming in her mouth is a key part of the thrill for you, you could ask your girl to give Masque gel strips a whirl. They’re thin films that dissolve on the tongue and look similar to breath-freshening strips, but are specially designed to completely wipe out the taste of ejaculate and replace it with a tang of watermelon, mango, mint, strawberry or chocolate.

Company spokesman Brian Gross says that, ‘unlike mints, for example, Masque strips don’t just try to cover up the flavour of ejaculate, but completely block the salts and proteins that can make it taste displeasing. They kick in instantly, and the effect lasts about 15 minutes.’ I shared some samples with friends and the verdicts were surprisingly good: feedback included: ‘I couldn’t taste anything apart from the strips – admittedly they were a bit artificial in flavour, but I liked the watermelon one,’ and, ‘better than expected, and good at keeping your mouth lubricated too’. Men can also use them while performing cunnilingus.
 
I think for a woman to spit in obvious disgust is rude, but if swallowing after the event is more ‘heaving’ than ‘heaven’ for your lady, she could try keeping cum towards the front of her mouth, letting it dribble down her chin and onto her chest, and massaging it into her breasts. Alternatively, she could spit it into her hands and rub it into her nipples and down her stomach. It’s about attitude and style. Removing it from her mouth ‘to play with it’ = sexy. Removing it from her mouth ‘because it’s nasty’ = unfeeling.
 
Alternatively...

  • Strong cinnamon gum can help conceal the flavour of cum, and add a tingly-warm sensation to blow jobs.
  • Keep a glass of water, juice or even champagne in easy reach by the bed so she can take sips afterwards, or whenever she needs.
  • Why not suggest she go down on you in the shower? Not only is wet sex superhot, but she can discreetly let the running water wash other liquids out of her mouth…

P.S. Smoking doesn’t help semen taste OK. It doesn’t help anything, ever, really, though since you’re health conscious I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that…

Alix Fox

Chirpier than a gargantuan aviary and saucier than an HP factory, Alix Fox was the resident expert on sex and relationships for Men’s Fitness UK, which predated, and then shared a website with, Coach. She has also been seen on the BBCChannel 4E4ITV and The Discovery Channel. Alix has also written for Bizarre magazine, Time Out and The Telegraph.